Monday, September 27, 2010

My Next/First Restaurant

If I were to run a restaurant, it would be called "You Are a Giant."  Everything in the place would be very tiny, as to make you feel like a giant.  Tiny glasses, tiny plates, tiny forks, tiny menus, etc.  After dinner, people would walk outside and on the way to their cars, things in the environment would slowly start to get bigger and bigger.  Of course, on the other side of the street would be my other restaurant, "You Are a Dwarf."

Friday, September 24, 2010

Thinking Outside the Bottle

Whenever I hear about a massive disaster somewhere in the world, there is always one thought that comes to mind.  It is highly likely that there was at least one person that was blackout drunk before the disaster happened.  When the person woke up, along with the normal feelings of regret and general confusion, they peered out the window and saw that everything he or she had ever known had been destroyed.  Everything was flooded.  It was raining fireballs from the sky.  It's the type of situation that brings D-list celebrities together for a song. 

Then, for a split second, that person truly believes that they were the cause of all the chaos. 

And that makes me smile.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Roommate Monopoly

My roommate is the worst person to play Monopoly with.  His strategy is all about making deals with you that always end up in his favor.  The last time we played, and I have no idea how he did this, but I ended up with a sub-prime mortgage on Baltic ave.  I thought I was winning for a while, then eight turns later, I was toast.